Nijlpaard

hippo(potamus) [noun] [het nijlpaard, de nijlpaarden] [‘nijl-paart’] Iconspeaker_klein

"Nijlpaard" literally translates to "nile horse". However, since there are no horses swimming in the river Nile, you may figure out that "nijlpaard" is actually a hippo or hippopotamus 🙂 We admit that there really isn’t much of a resemblance in appearance between the two….

Sometimes, "nijlpaard" is used in a derogatory way to refer to a fat woman.

Examples:
– "Een nijlpaard is een zoogdier."
("A hippopotamus is a mammal.")

– "Mam, mogen we de nijlpaarden voeren?" – "Nee liefie, dat mag niet."

("Mom, can we feed the hippos?" – "No sweetie, you can’t.")

– "Franks vriendin is een nijlpaard…" – "Sorry, maar dat kun je echt niet zeggen."
("Frank’s girlfriend is a hippo…" – "I’m sorry, but you really can’t say that.")

Related words:
– "Nijl": (the river) Nile.
– "Paard": horse.
– "Neushoorn": Rhino(ceros).

Regelen

to arrange/organize/settle, to take care of something [verb] [regelde, geregeld] [‘ree-gu-lun’] Iconspeaker_3

The noun “regel” translates to “rule” or “line (sentence)”. The verb
“regelen” however, takes on a different meaning. And don’t mistake it
for “regenen”, which means “to rain”.

Examples:

“Mijn complimenten, je hebt het allemaal prima geregeld!”

(“My compliments, you have organized it (all) very well!”)

Morgen gaan we op vakantie en we moeten nog van alles doen en
ik raak helemaal gestresst!!” – “Maak je geen zorgen, ik regel het wel!”

(“Tomorrow
we’re going on holiday and we still have to do many things and I’m
getting completely stressed!!” – “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it!”)

– “En hoe laat worden we dan opgehaald?” – “Ik weet het niet precies; Madelon heeft alles geregeld.”

(“And at what time will we be picked up?” – “I don’t know exactly, Madelon has organized everything.”)

– “Ik stuur zo een uitnodiging rond. Kan jij dan even een vergaderruimte regelen?”

(“I’ll send around an invitation in a minute. Can you arrange a meeting
room?” Note that ‘even’ has no real meaning here; it is used to make
the request sound friendlier.)

Related words:

– “Regelneef”: popular word for the male person who mainly organizes
things as part of his job. A “neef” is actually a “cousin” or a
“nephew” (and that’s why Dutch people often say nephew when they mean
cousin).

– “Geregel”: organizing/coordinating.

Example:

-“Hoe is je nieuwe baan?” – “O, wel leuk, heel veel geregel, maar dat kan ik heel goed.”

(“How is your new job?” – “Oh, quite ok, lots of organizing, but I’m very good at that.”)

– “Regeling”: arrangement, settlement.
– “Dingen regelen”: to take care of things/stuff.

– “Geregeld!”: taken care of/done/completed!

– “Organiseren”: to organize.

– “Coördineren”: to co-ordinate.

Waarschijnlijk

likely, probable, plausible, presumable [adjective/adverb] [‘waar-schijn-luk’] Iconspeaker_3

The
verb "schijnen" can translate to "to shine" or "to appear/seem". The
latter is applicable here and together with "waar" ("true"), the literal translation would be something like "appearing to be true".

The opposite of "waarschijnlijk" is "onwaarschijnlijk".

Examples:
"Weet jij of Frank nog op kantoor is?" – "Nee, maar waarschijnlijk is hij al naar huis."
("Do you know if Frank is still at the office?" – "No, but it is likely that he has already gone home.")

"Kom jij aanstaande zaterdag ook naar het concert?" – "Waarschijnlijk wel ja, maar ik weet het niet 100% zeker."
("Will you be at / come to the concert this Saturday?" – "Probably yes, but I am not 100% certain.")

– "Start Windows anders opnieuw op, het heeft waarschijnlijk geen zin, maar je weet het nooit!"

("Otherwise just reboot Windows, it is probably useless, but you never know!" Note the use of "opstarten": to start up, to boot. Add "opnieuw" (again) if you want to reboot or restart 🙂 .)

Related words:

– "Mogelijk": possible.
– "Onwaarschijnlijk": unlikely, not probable.
– "Waarschijnlijkheid": likelihood, probability.
– "Zekerheid": certainty.
– "Vast": surely.
– "Schijnbaar": seemingly, apparently.

Extra:
Impress your Dutch manager by putting the following phrase in one of your reports: "Met aan zekerheid grenzende waarschijnlijkheid".
This means "with likelihood approaching certainty" and is formal
language for "very likely", mostly used to hide your true understanding
of the matter at hand 🙂

Joekel

whopper, a really big one [noun] [de joekel, de joekels] [‘joe-kul’] Iconspeaker_klein_2

"Joekel" is used informally to refer to something of great size. This can be practically anything. "Joekel" is often used in the common construction "een joekel van een …", see the Examples.

"Joekel" can sometimes have a sexual connotation. The singular "joekel" would be the male genital organ, whereas the plural "joekels" would refer to a woman’s sizable breasts.

By the way, a Burgerking "Whopper" is not a "Joekel", but just a "Whopper":-)

Examples:
– "Ik heb nog nooit zo’n grote spin gezien, wat een joekel!"
("I’ve never seen such a big spider, what a whopper!") 

– "Ik had gisteravond een feestje, nu heb ik een joekel van een kater…"
("I had a party last night, now I have a really big hangover…")

– "Zo moppie, jij hebt lekkere joekels!" – "Oprotten viezerik, of ik bel de politie!"
("Well sweetie, you have a nice set of knockers!" – "Piss off you pervert, or I’ll call the police!")

Related words:
– "Kanjer": synonymous to "joekel": whopper. Also used to refer to a person of great character/skills.
– "Groot": big, large.

Dat slaat nergens op

that makes no sense at all [Dutch phrase of the week] Iconspeaker_klein

The informal "dat slaat nergens op" can be a bit stronger than "that makes no sense at all", and can convey the message that you think it is ridiculous or plain crazy.

The literal translation does not seem to make much sense: "That beats/hits on nowhere". In this context however, "slaan op" translates to "to refer to", where "nergens" translates to "nowhere". From "that refers to nowhere" it is a small step to "that makes no sense at all", well, at least it is for us 😉

To say it even stronger, "helemaal" can be added to the phrase: "Dat slaat helemaal nergens op!" And if you are looking for (implicit) confirmation, you can add "toch": "dat slaat toch helemaal nergens op!" 🙂

You will also hear the question: "Waar slaat dit op?" ("What is this about? / What is this supposed to be/do?")

Examples:
– "Meneer, u mag hier niet parkeren!" – "Belachelijk! Dat slaat helemaal nergens op!"
("Sir, you are not allowed to park here!" – "Ridiculous! That really makes no sense at all!")

– "Wat vond je van de uitleg van de professor?" – "Die sloeg helemaal nergens op!"
("What did you think of the professor’s explanation?" – "It really didn’t make any sense at all!")

– "Het slaat nergens op dat ik door die mierenneuker word beschuldigd van het gebruiken van schuttingtaal!"
("It’s ridicuous that I’m being accused of using foul language by that nitpicker!")

– "De prijs die je tegenwoordig moet betalen voor een enkeltje Den Haag – Amsterdam slaat helemaal nergens op!"
("The price one has to pay nowadays for a single ticket from The Hague to Amsterdam is ridiculous!" Note that "enkel" in Dutch can have two meanings: ‘single’, or ‘ankle’. It is common to use the diminutive "enkeltje" for a single train ticket. A return ticket is a "retour" or "retourtje".)

Related words:
– "Onzin": nonsense.
– "Belachelijk": ridiculous. Lit. "laughable".
– "Onterecht": unjust, wrongful.